A little more about me

So i have filled you in ( Sort of ), on what usually goes on during my day, i have also given you a brief run down on how i got to be where i am today. But what about the in-betweeners? I'm just going to jump on in there with a list.

100 28 Things you may not know about me.

1. I'm now 20, but am rarley compared to others my age as the lifestyle i have compared to most fellow 20 year olds i know is of dire opposites.

2. Still engaged, have been for over 2 years now, and i am not planning on getting married until all my children can be at my wedding

3. I'm a taurus, and a very stubborn taurus at that.

4. Anti-religous, i don't mind for others to have theirs, just dont push it on me please.

5. I enjoy

6. singing, in the car, in the shower, wherever

7. scrapbooking, if i ever get the time for it

8. blogging, it's a new found love of mine

9.bed, before princess i would stay in bed all day

10. working, i have always been a very work driven person.

11. I dislike

12. liars, no need for it

13. Mice, just seeing one will bring on near fainting and hyperventilating

14. judgement, because people are always too quick to judge me and are usually wrong

15. wine, besides 1 brand of red, i just cant stomach it

16. Other little things

17. i have always wanted a garden

18. i Prefere a flat white coffee to a cappacino

19. I can never understand why some people do the things they do

20. I keep alot inside because i dont like confrontation

21. I wish i had a close friend like in the movies

22. I generally wish more things happened like in the movies

(labour- little bit of sweat one push and the babies out, gee that would be nice)

23. I watch too many movies

24. I fear the death of loved ones and how i will cope

25. Lost my father very young

26. Have a terrible memory, i write lots and lots of lists

27. I always start new things and consequently stop after a very short time.

(Be proud i am still blogging, have found it quite therapuatic)

28. I always get sidetracked and forget what i was doing

*Wanders off to turn the jug on for cup of coffee*



Giant parenting fail on my part *sigh*

So princess had her first night in the cot with the toddler rail on last night. For the most part it went well, she stayed in bed, slept all night, all the good stuff you would hope for. Until this morning. Expecting her to come into me when she woke up, I didn't set an alarm, just waited for my snotty wake up kiss and nose honking. Instead I woke up to a childs cd player being thrown on my head, and a bright eyed child who had clearly been awake for a while. Do I dare get up to inspect the damage?

Fail one, was me expecting her to come into me. How bloody stupid. I can only imagine , her running the halls of the house with all the freedom in the world singing "I'm walking on sunshine" ( if she could sing) .

Fail two, was not shutting doors, she had free run of the entire house. That includes the bathroom. So I get up and the bedroom is not too bad except for the cd player next to my pillow. Walk out, OH FUCK . Powder foundation Everywhere. An entire bottle, the stuff was over priced to begin with and now instead of being on my face it's on the toilet seat, the lounges, AND the cat.

Giant mummy fail on my part, i say, as I wander off to the shops to invest in even more childproofing latches etc. Or I could just not be a fricken idiot and keep the doors shut.

Just a little realisation

WARNING: The following text contains soppy mumming ramblings about being proud, excited, "they grow up to quickly" etc.

Seriously though, they do. I could have sworn it was just yesterday i was grunting and groaning starkers naked in front of a rather large audience to deliver my beautiful little princess. Yet today, i am puliing down cot sides to make room for "toddler rails". Today, i watched my litle girl eat dinner by herself and proclaim to me "Yummy! Num num din" . Today, i got a back rub when i asked princess for one.

-Quick side note, why does it seem she understands everything i say except for the things i REALLY want her to understand i.e. "Please, no don't take the cat in the bath.. aw too late"-

Anywho, back to what i was saying, time is getting ahead of me. I was asked recently the age of princess and had to stop myself at saying 15 months when i realised , wait no, she is 17 months old now. Getting closer to 2, that scares me.

What doesn't scare me however, and more pleases me, is hearing from a number of people that my daughter is advanced for her age, her REAL age after i have corrected myself. Now i don't know, I don't have other children to compare to... (for now). Is it perhaps something other people say to make you feel good? Or have i gone and bred myself a genious baby? Maybe i should be putting my other genious eggs to good use while they are still ripe. Not sure, will have to take it to hubby and get back to you on that one.

Proud mummy blog complete. I will be sure to have come off my high by my next blog, where i can go back to whinging about another coffee gone cold.

Liar Liar Pants on Fire!

Two blogs in one day. Wham-o. I just have so much to say. So many people to say it to.. ok so all three of my readers.. Hello to you, can i just say it is nice to no longer be talking to myself. Not that i am not used to it or anything *snickers*

I lie to myself, ALOT. Here are some of the lies i tell myself-

*Im going to get up early and be showered and dressed before princess wakes up.
I sleep till princess wakes up and drag myself out of bed, lounge around in my pajamas for two hours.

*I'm going to power clean so i can have the rest of the day free.
I delay many things and my washing ussually sits for a couple of hours and gets thrown in the dryer.

*I'm going to start an excercise regime to lose the "gut"
After 17 months, "baby weight" just ain't cutting it as an excuse anymore. I'm still gunna use it though!

*I will not have a 4th, 5th, coffee because i know it is bad for me and will give me a headache
Currently sitting on my 4th.

*Put princess to bed and do quick top up clean so i can wake up to a clean house
Put princess to bed, make coffee, sit on butt, do nothing.

* i will show H my appreciation for him.
mmm bed.. so warm... sleep?

Bad mummy! Bad wifey!

Time for a time out.

Pshh, we all know you should never do a grocedry shop when you are hungry. It can be the difference between breakfast, lunches and 7 nights worth of dinner, or going to the cupboard and realising the cupboard is full of chips and chocolate. Generally taking me back to the shops the following day (with a tummy ache).

However, I learnt another lesson on Sunday. NEVER shop for clothes/ toys, when you are missing your child.

Let me start from the beginning. Miss mental breakdown here had to send sweet princess to Grandmas for the weekend. Mental breakdown caused by a number of things, phobia triggered panic attack, stress, and the fact that princess is almost at her terrible two's stage. She is getting annoyed with me, i am getting anoyyed with her, we are both just generally getting too worked up and exasperated. Time out.

The weekend was definately needed, i took some time to myself, stepped back and analysed the problems we were having and how i could fix them. She was bored for starters, stuffed toys and books simply were not cutting it anymore. There were certain draws and cupboard throughout the house that were getting emptied daily.  Also... THAT BLOODY BIN! What is it with kids and the bloody bin? No princess you are not allowed to eat your toast from this morning out of the bin i simply will not allow it!

Did some child proofing, made room in a cupboard for the bin, Moved contents of draws and cupboards elsewhere,  and dragged myself to the shops. So here i am shopping for my sweet princess that i haven't seen in 2 whole days. My darling girl who i am ridden with guilt for leaving. Telling myself she needed those new pair of shoes ( or 2 or 3). She definately needs a new wardrobe ( 20% off, and all the clothes are just so darn gorgeous!) Absolute necessity that she gets and abundance of new toys.... Or not?

So my weekend was a success, with princess pretty much having nothing left to get into that i disapprove of i am getting angry less often, and still have some patience remaining for when i need it.  I also had that time to miss her, and with us both being happier, we are enjoying each other alot more.

So maybe the clothes and toys were not ALL "needs", and more "wants"  but she sure does love the new toys, and i sure do love her in her new clothes.

It's ok, it was only my birthday you forgot.

Happy Birthday to me. Yes happy Birthday to me.... for yesterday. Was nothing too special. In fact i think i can safely say it was pretty shitty. Worked through the day, and locked myself out for 2 Hours in the morning with no keys or phone, had to wait for the automatic locking system to turn off at 11. It is quite hard to literally just sit and "be" for 2 hours with absolutely nothing to distract you. At least i had the sunshine to keep me warm and content Less pissed off.  I continued to tough out the rest of the day all the while kissing my teenage years goodbye, although i must say i haven't felt like a teenager in quite a while.

H brightened my day as i came home to chocolates, winter essentials (ugg boots, mink blanket, flanelette pajamas) and a hot coffee, followed by a delicious home cooked meal. Yes guys, hubby is still cooking dinner, and beyond discussion of it, will continue to cook meals gladly whilst i do little top up cleans and get Princess ready for bed. Sounds like a fair deal i say. 

Back to the point of this post, it's pretty hard to forget someones birthdays these days right? what with phone alarms, digital diary's and the all important facebook to remind you. But.. my best friend still forgot. I had been texting her during the day in hope she might realise, but no. Nothing. I have pretty much put it to the back of my mind as i don't exactly know how pissed off i should be. I would have thought it was near impossible. I guess i just have to be thankful that there were important people in my life that DID remember, and that it could have been alot worse right? maybe, but just let me wollow in self pity for a while ok!?

Terrific Terrible Tuesdays... One week late

Well, this is officially my third attempt at trying to write this post, seriously... MY THIRD!

So princess has decided she is too big for daytime naps now, that means no more "me time" , i know, i know it's a very sad milestone, especially when she is in fact still getting tired enough in which she needs said nap, but instead bothers me with her tired crankiness. Oh joy!

Now, what happened on my Tuesday? I hit a standstill and i hit it hard. It made me realise my social life has gone out the window. I run out of things to clean. Yes thats right, as i was putting away hubby's freshly cleaned white shoes and football boots, i looked around and had nothing left to clean. This is a very sad realisation to make. No not the realisation that i may have OCD, but the fact i have no one who dare bothers to make time to socialise with me.

So instead i spend all my time at home cleaning, i ensure you my house is very clean. It's boredom, so bored that i went through and disinfected every single ball in my daughter's ball pit, so bored that i cleaned H's shoes.

Why is it that now i am a mum? People think i don't want a social life. It is really getting me down. Don't think i haven't tried either. Tried to make time with my current friends, Tried to make new friends through the form of online "Mother's Groups". Even my internet friends can't find time for me. All i want to know is what makes me such a horrible person. I know i am not perfect, oh no certainly not, but i know one thing i do extremely well is friendship. I thrive on friendship, and therefore always put my whole being into it.
 *SIGH*

Chocolate for breakfast? Ah go on then.

Apologies for my long break from blogging, i have wanted to get around to it for a few days now and low and behold the house work took number one priority. Yes thats right still have not won the lotto, therefore do not have a maid yet. *sigh*

So i went away for the long  weekend and may i say it was absolute bliss. Just what the doctor ordered i would say, even though the doctor said everything was fine and didn't order anything. Oh yes the doctor? In case you had forgotten last week i was awaiting blood/hormone results to find out why my energy, libido and appetite had all gone missing. Well the results came back and despite the fact that i was a walking zombie with a hubby who was feeling a little unloved, everything was normal. I think now i just had to pin it to stress and exhaustion, in need of a small holiday perhaps?

The holiday helped alot. The energy was aided in the form of late morning sleep-ins waking up to the sound of the beach outside my window. My appetite grew to like the bacon and egg breakfasts and nights of dining out, and my libido? Well i started taking a herbal supplement to "make your hormones run at their best", it started working after just 3 days.

Holidays always come with a downside or two but don't they? We only travelled for 5 hours in the car, however the cranky, bottomless pit in the back seat seemed to stretch that out a little. Yes, bottomless pit, the 11kg toddler eats more than i do. The thing that really bugs me though, is the minute you get home, the tidy spotless house you walked out of, instantly becomes a bomb site. BANG- 5 loads of clothing to be washed. BANG- a car full of food scraps (because when you need a little peace and quiet you just let them have the damned bag of chips even though you know they are just going to tip it straight upside down don't you?) BANG- a fridge full of squishy fruit and chunky milk that you just know you should have tossed before you left.

Definately worth it though, i feel new again, at least until about 2 weeks down the track where the holiday buzz has disappered and im pining to go away again. What did everyone else get up to for their long weekend? Did anyone else try to sneak a chocolate bunny into bed for breakfast without the littlies noticing? Consequently letting the little ones with super smelling/hearing powers eat a chocolate bunny for breakfast?